all knees and elbows to the touch
wet like the first time i ran home in thick rain
i was too young to remember to look up
or the soft kiss of love's lips on my skin
contrasting the burning heat of summer
in the wet woods by the lake at Wolf Creek
i was all elbows and knees
no scars to landmark my history
each piece of patchwork less perfect than the next
no crooked nosed smile or chipped tooth
still months away from Darren Brewer's basement
and the uppercut that fell heavily on the tail of two miller lights
two birds with one stone cold throw
i fell, stood up, we laughed like children
my mother cried quietly
elbows and knees are familiar with bruises
a kind of uncomfortable familiarity
that begs concrete mercy in a fall
a simple, heavy memory
a hand on a hot stove
a foot turned the wrong way by a root
i wasn't running from anything
it was the joy of the breeze meeting sweat
that kept me moving
the blood dried, scabbed and healed
my skin holds the memory
-----------
You never forget the firsts.
The first time you keep on falling,
you don't remember how long or why
you began to fall in the first place.
Was it her smile, framed in dimples?
The way her hands communicate something more than words
when her fingertips rest lightly on the back of your neck?
The first time your intention fails to meet with meaning.
There's a misfire and the white flag can't unfold quick enough
to satisfy that climbing, chain linked fence fending off apologies.
She's crying and your stomach screams to be forgiven
but words can't make it past the weight sitting on your chest,
so you vomit instead.
Seeking compassion that isn't yet strong enough to climb the fence,
cross that empty field where you wait, flag in hand,
ready to humbly accept the terms of your surrender.
The first time her words fail her.
Brown eyes meet yours and she's begging you to understand
that she's forgotten how to breath without you.
And the only way she can fall asleep is in your bed
where the bad dreams and days can't find her anymore.
You can feel it in her fragile grip, she's a part of you
and for the first time, you are not afraid of permanence.
-----------
I will reach the end of days in the firm grip of a lover.
I will feel the simple pains or pleasures, heralded
by each new ray of sunlight, each new drop of rain.
I will face the inevitable with a veterans confidence,
our fingers tied tightly together.
And whether or not the hand loses strength, her eyes made a promise that death can't pardon,
if our hearts truly believe in perfection.
Comentarios